Are people just unreliable or are we just too rigid?

Paul was bring accused of being unreliable because though he told them about him coming to see them he actually changed his mind. How annoying!

What happened was this:-

• Paul promised to visit, “After I go through Macedonia, I will come to you—for I will be going through Macedonia” (1 Cor 16 v 5)
• Paul did visit but it was a difficult one, “So I made up my mind that I would not make another painful visit to you.” (2 Cor 2 v 1)
• Later he was slandered by a man and we will see this later in 2 Cor 2 v 5-10.
• Paul changed his mind and decided it best not to visit again.

“Now this is our boast: Our conscience testifies that we have conducted ourselves in the world, and especially in our relations with you, with integrityand godly sincerity. We have done so, relying not on worldly wisdom but on God’s grace. ¹³ For we do not write you anything you cannot read or understand. And I hope that, ¹⁴ as you have understood us in part, you will come to understand fully that you can boast of us just as we will boast of you in the day of the Lord Jesus. ¹⁵ Because I was confident of this, I wanted to visit you first so that you might benefit twice. ¹⁶ I wanted to visit you on my way to Macedonia and to come back to you from Macedonia, and then to have you send me on my way to Judea. ¹⁷ Was I fickle when I intended to do this? Or do I make my plans in a worldly manner so that in the same breath I say both “Yes, yes” and “No, no”? (2 Corinthians 1 v 12-17)

The Corinthians cynicism said this, “Paul you say this but you don’t mean it. You said you would come but you never intended to do so. Out of your mouth comes Yes and at the same time No.”

Paul is defending himself and in doing so he teaches us about this challenge of being reliable but also not rigid in our decisions. He is saying to them he never had hidden motives. He is committed to his relationship to them with integrity and sincerity which means that even when circumstances change I will remain committed to my relationship with you. But here is the key: our relationships must contain the flexibility so that wisdom, love and especially the Holy Spirit can guide our decisions. It means that integrity in relationships isn’t necessarily about unchanged plans but being consistent to the values of that relationship as circumstances change.

There are times in all our lives when after making commitments, circumstances change that we never saw come nor did we create those changes, they just happened and the wisdom of the Spirit releases us from being stuck to them. This is not using flexibility as an excuse for unreliability. But it is allowing for freedom to change original plans because wisdom says so.